3.4.15
Better Family Communications
8:19 PM
Do you and your family members spend more time writing activities into the family calendar than communicating with each other? This has been a problem for some families for a very long time. Families think that being busy means being successful, but the real secret to success and security for the future is to feel like a close family that wins and loses together. Family communications are not what they should be in most families. Block out a few hours here and there on your calendar when no other activities are allowed and make time to be together as a family. The amazing results are almost immediate.
Your teenagers may act as if they don't care how good or how bad family communications are or how much time they spend with you, but know that they crave your attention. It is harder for teenagers to express the need to feel secure and a part of the family than younger children. They need the security and benefit of good family communications more than you could know. No matter how much they grumble and groan, work towards more family time time that can be spent talking as well as doing something together.
Family meal time is a great way to get started opening up more family communications. Many families are so busy that they eat when they can, and the dining room table is rarely occupied by more than one person at a time if anyone bothers to eat there at all. Make it a rule that you all have to eat together at least one night a week and on the weekends. After you have gotten a handle on this, make it two nights a week. You may not get everyone together every night, but you are going to notice that family communications improve after just a few nights at the table together.
You can also make sure that you have one family activity each weekend. This can be something that changes each week, but have a set time. Perhaps you want everyone to be available every Sunday afternoon. Maybe the best time is Saturday mornings. Find what is best for your family. Family communications will grow from these activities. You may not even have to talk much to feel better, and you may notice problems in your children that you had never noticed before. This time is precious for so many reasons.
Many families tried to institute 'family meetings' to try to make sure family communications where what they should have been. These never work, or rarely work. Most families feel the title puts too much pressure on everyone. Instead, work you family communications into the above ideas, and the small moments that you have together. Talk to your kids as you drive them to school, and drink your coffee later. Perhaps you have time to see how they did during the day while you make dinner. Ask them to help and you will find they start to open up without much prompting from you.